asha bhonsle.com

Hereapos;s something that doesnapos;t fit in with my normal shtick: I like shopping.

I know that automatically relegates me to an empty-headed, environment destroying consumer, filling up emotional voids with things, at worst, and a hypocrite, at best. But Iapos;ve admitted it to myself, very reluctantly.

I donapos;t like clothes shopping, or shoes shopping. That makes me frantic and indecisive and down on myself. Iapos;d like to cultivate a personal style if I ever have income for it, but it mostly includes being weird for weirdapos;s sake (I did find a pair of old style Russian felt boots in the trash in front of a playhouse. Itapos;s a start :P [theyapos;re warm, too]).

I love book shopping, music shopping, grocery shopping, and even household products shopping. I feel good when I purchase these things, and now that Iapos;ve realized this, I need to figure out why. A sense of accomplishment? Maybe, in life otherwise nearly devoid. But itapos;s probably cause the need of stuff has invaded my brain on a fundamental level. Stuff will make me organized, stuff will make me happy, stuff will make me sophisticated, comfortable, motivated, disciplined, okay in crowds. Stuff is a magical balm of sane.

How sad for me, Iapos;m a consumer in a consumerapos;s age, through and through.

*****

Iapos;ve been thinking about gentrification for a while, sort of tangentially. There was an article on Gawker about Moby complaining that all the commenters over there are just too mean, and they bash him for being a hypocrite, since he has a high-end vegan teahouse right in my neighborhood, but spouts the traditional rhetoric concerning his vague hippie ideals of fun happy love for everyone. He also owns a lot of Manhattan property and is very, very rich.

They had another one about a bummy looking hipster dropping his bank statement. Someone came and picked it up, and the guy who cultivated the homeless look had 400K in his account.

I get it. A little jealousy mixed with righteous anger at the attitude-behavior split of the so-called elite.

I thought I had a rational argument here, but my emotions and thoughts and self are so mixed up about money and status that Iapos;m having a difficult time stating it. I donapos;t know about you, but I am jealous of rich people. For me, rich equates to a certain extent with "better." Donapos;t ask me to define why, or I might write you a novel. But I also think it works that way for most people, because of course we havenapos;t moved that far away from class issues.

If only I had the right clothes, or went to the right school, or had the right artwork, or got invited to the right parties? But I guess I donapos;t really want any of those things. At least for status. I wish I had a job right now, and if I went to Yale I probably would. I like art.

Everyone wants some sort of status, in their families, the public, at their jobs. I donapos;t know what kind I want? Maybe? I certainly want the means to accomplish my goals.

The other, opposite point floating around in my head is the fact that the "elite" classes often do introduce more progressive values, values that are often later accepted by the public at large.

So when culture rags like Gawker or whatever create this pseudo-hip mentality that some kinds of values are laughable, Iapos;m torn. I go both ways. I like little teashops, I like fair trade, I like trying and usually failing to be a responsible consumer. Everyoneapos;s a hypocrite, but it seems worse when the powerful rich people do it. And, like life, not fucking fair.
asha bhonsle.com, asha bhosale, asha bhosale marathi songs, asha bhosale songs.